False Start For The Sack Race

Sep 28 2008 Gordon Waddell

Moaning Fans Live In A Fantasy Land

HALF-TIME at Pittodrie last week. Guy wanders past the press box. Not aggressive. Perfectly sane.

And he asks: "Why is that man not under pressure? Why is he not fearing for his job?"

You could almost understand it if he was talking about Jimmy Calderwood. The Dons boss has put up with that kind of chat since he went there four years ago.

But it was Craig Levein. Five-and-a-half games in to a season, this guy reckons the man who hoisted Dundee United from the bottom of the table to European contenders and CIS Cup finalists inside 18 months has run his course.

If ever you wanted a summary of the screwed up, skewed relationship between fantasy and reality we have with football in this country, that's it right there.

He's not alone either.

At least four SPL teams' messageboards are running polls on whether their manager should stay or go.

Lose to Dunfermline in midweek? Sorry Gus, time's up. Booed off the park.

Doesn't matter that MacPherson took the Buds from the bottom half of the First Division to the SPL and has kept them there on a shoestring for three seasons.

Or that he's signed some cracking players from the bargain bucket. Forget it. One result, nail in your coffin.

And you. Yogi Hughes. Fourth straight season in the SPL, a club record. Three Under-21 internationals in your squad, all brought through by you.

Your captain, another product of your system, has just become the first Scotland cap the club have had in half a century.

Sorry, time's up mate. Don't you realise you can't take your team any further? That your blind spots are killing you?

Jimmy C as well. Fourth, third, sixth and fourth in the SPL. Yet Dons had been flirting with relegation like a dockside hooker with a sailor before he arrived.

Took them to Europe, the group stages and beyond. Gave them a night they'll never forget against Bayern Munich.

But apparently he wouldn't know a team or a set of tactics if they skelped him in the coupon with a wet haddie.

Off you pop, now - and don't let the door hit your a**e as it swings shut. Okay, it's not everyone. But a carcinogenic number are unhappy and never tire of letting you know.

So let's take the leap. Let's say your club bullets your guy tomorrow. Three questions: One. Who do you want in? Two. Who would realistically take the job? Three. What do you expect from him?

Because the grass isn't always greener.

I can almost understand it at Aberdeen and Dundee United because of their history. But that's all it is. The past isn't a guarantee. Bottom line, they're the same as every other team in the division now.

At teams like Falkirk, St Mirren, Inverness though? I'd like to think after 36 years of watching the Bairns I'm qualified to answer a bit of that.

I want my team to be in the top division, although I know it's not our divine right.

I want to wake up on a Saturday with hope in my heart, not fear in my stomach.

I want us to win more than we lose. Every other year, Iwant us to put together a cup run. A semi final, maybe. A final once in a blue moon.

And the dream? Once, just once, I want to see my team qualify for Europe - 18 other Scottish clubs have done it. Not mine. I don't expect it, I just dream one day we can squeeze our head past what I think is our natural glass ceiling and get there from the league.

To me, that's a fairly reasonable list. Not inaccessible, but not unambitious. If you want more than that, annual success, then be my guest. Go and follow the Old Firm or Man U. Be a glory hunter.

For those that choose to stay, though? Think about where you are and what you're wishing for.

And let your manager manage.

Look at Kilmarnock. Jim Jefferies has had his critics over the years but they know what side their bread's buttered on.

In seven seasons, he's had five finishes in the top six. But the times they were 10th and 11th, Killie didn't bullet him.

Probably because they looked round and thought: If we change things who do we get that would do any better?

Further up the ladder look at Sir Alex Ferguson and Arsene Wenger.

Look at what faith and longevity does for you. It gets you to the point where you can put your Under-12 team out in the Carling Cup and still win games.

I'm not saying there's never a time for a boss to get the tin tack. Of course there is. It's football. And if you're not happy with what you're seeing, you pay to say it.

But where is a new manager going to take Aberdeen or St Mirren or Falkirk or Dundee United that the current guy doesn't already have them?

There's not much room above them - but there's a lot below. Be careful what you wish for.