Alison's Diary

Oct 19 2008

MONDAY

Hosting a dinner dance for Spinal Injuries Scotland in Glasgow and there is a late push to sell tickets. It seems the credit crunch affects charity too. They have announced a partnership with Scuderia Ecosse Ferrari GT racing for road safety campaigning in Scotland. And the raffle prize for the night? A car - though sadly not one of their Ferraris. I'm sure the tickets will sell out soon. I wonder if I can enter? Probably not.

The first two years I wrote my diary for the Sunday Mail I won the two big raffle prizes at the Great Scot awards - a £2000 diamond necklace and two return tickets to fly anywhere in Europe. Of course I couldn't accept either and was disgusted with myself that I had to bite my wobbly lip as I was close to bursting into tears. Anyway if you would like to come along to the Thistle Hotel on Friday, November 7, support Spinal Injuries Scotland and have a chance to win a brand new motor, check out www.sisonline.org to buy tickets.

TUESDAY

Off to see Calendar Girls at The Kings in Edinburgh tonight. It is a sell-out so mum and I arrive early to get a lager and scampi at Bennets Bar next door. As I queue for my tickets I meet a couple from Livingston who realise their tickets are for Thursday - they are embarrassed but happy to come back. It's a fantastic night. The entire cast are superb. My favourite is fellow columnist Elaine C Smith, who plays Cora. She looks great, sounds great, plays piano, sings and reminds us she is our uber-talented national treasure - with nae knickers. The show is off to London so if you don't catch it here, get your girlfriends together for a New Year treat - it's the best show I've seen in years.

WEDNESDAY

A few weeks ago I wrote about Safetox, the natural alternative to Botox. Well, the company in Belgium sent me a sample to try for a month. As you can see from my picture, it looks innocuous enough and claims to retrain the muscles so you get rid of the grumper line between the eyebrows.

I read the instructions, ping it on and can't believe how vigorous it is. It must do something. I have to use it for 10 minutes a day for the first three days then for shorter times but more intensely. It feels really weird and makes the area above the line feel quite numb. Louis thinks it is hilarious and wants a shot - within three seconds he takes it off. "That's too sore," he says. Huh men.

It's not painful, it's just a bit weird...and I am someone who needs gas and air for a leg wax. I shall keep you informed of my progress.

THURSDAY

As I whine to my pal about the credit crunch she reveals gold is at a 25-year high. She says I must have something lurking in my jewellery box I don't wear. Yes, I do have a chunky old bangle so I'm ordered to go into Macintyres, a wholesale jeweller in Edinburgh, where you can exchange gold for something new or cash. They weigh my bracelet and give me £100. In addition if I take store credit, I get an extra 25 per cent.

Happy Aberdonian, I went in with an old bangle and come out with a Hot Diamond set. I flash it at Dave at tea time. "Who has been buying you diamonds?" he asks suspiciously. "Me," I announce. He thinks I've lost it. Ha ha - I haven't lost it, I've exchanged it.

FRIDAY

On Fred MacAulay show talking about the fact Gary Lineker's fiancee Danielle Bux, left, can't stand football so I must confess whether I share a love of things Dave does in his spare time. That opens a can of worms. Golf is the one that jumps to mind for a few reasons. One, it takes all day. Two, there are the dubious sartorial choices that go with it, such as the plus-four breeks guaranteed to make even George Clooney look 65, let alone your average Scotsman. Add to this the fact they relive the entire game stroke by stroke in the 19th afterwards, offering each other tips and advice for their next attempt. It's enough to drive the rest of us to the 19th hole too. I have taken the plunge on occasion on the course and have been bombarded with so much unwanted advice - all I want is a bit of fun. Infuriating. Dave just looks bemused as he puts down his golf bag and unbuttons his 1950s-style blazer. I rest my case.

SATURDAY

Sit in Zanzero restaurant in Edinburgh for six hours having a girls' lunch. I think they call this continental-style dining but they probably go easier on the vino. They have a Bring Your Own Bottle policy which we take advantage of while stuffing our chops with lovely Italian food. When the waiters start setting the tables for dinner we decide it is maybe time to move on. What a laugh. Eight old pals and so much chat - it's good for the soul. Coupled with a night in front of X Factor and Strictly Come Dancing, this may well be my perfect recipe for a Saturday. Watch one, tape the other - am I sad? No, I love it. I reckon Jodie Kidd, right, will be out next on Strictly. It gives me hope that tall supermodels can look like carthorses. If only us carthorses could look like supermodels - then life would be complete.